Paul Harvey-Apr 1965
Library
This
speech was broadcast by legendary ABC Radio commentator Paul Harvey on April 3,
1965:
If
I were the Devil . . . I mean, if I were the Prince of Darkness, I would of
course, want to engulf the whole earth in darkness. I would have a third of its
real estate and four-fifths of its population, but I would not be happy until I
had seized the ripest apple on the tree, so I should set about however
necessary to take over the United States. I would begin with a campaign of
whispers. With the wisdom of a serpent, I would whisper to you as I whispered
to Eve: “Do as you please.” “Do as you please.” To the young, I would whisper,
“The Bible is a myth.” I would convince them that man created God instead of
the other way around. I would confide that what is bad is good, and what is
good is “square”. In the ears of the young marrieds, I would whisper that work
is debasing, that cocktail parties are good for you. I would caution them not
to be extreme in religion, in patriotism, in moral conduct. And the old, I
would teach to pray. I would teach them to say after me: “Our Father, which art
in Washington” . . .
If
I were the Devil, I’d educate authors in how to make lurid literature exciting
so that anything else would appear dull an uninteresting. I’d threaten T.V.
with dirtier movies and vice versa. And then, if I were the devil, I’d get
organized. I’d infiltrate unions and urge more loafing and less work, because
idle hands usually work for me. I’d peddle narcotics to whom I could. I’d sell
alcohol to ladies and gentlemen of distinction. And I’d tranquilize the rest
with pills. If I were the devil, I would encourage schools to refine yound
intellects but neglect to discipline emotions . . . let those run wild. I would
designate an athiest to front for me before the highest courts in the land and
I would get preachers to say “she’s right.” With flattery and promises of
power, I could get the courts to rule what I construe as against God and in
favor of pornography, and thus, I would evict God from the courthouse, and then
from the school house, and then from the houses of Congress and then, in His
own churches I would substitute psychology for religion, and I would deify
science because that way men would become smart enough to create super weapons
but not wise enough to control them.
If
I were Satan, I’d make the symbol of Easter an egg, and the symbol of Christmas,
a bottle. If I were the devil, I would take from those who have and I would
give to those who wanted, until I had killed the incentive of the ambitious.
And then, my police state would force everybody back to work. Then, I could
separate families, putting children in uniform, women in coal mines, and
objectors in slave camps. In other words, if I were Satan, I’d just keep on
doing what he’s doing.
Paul
Harvey, Good Day!